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  • Lust engulfed me as his cock and fingers fuelled the fire.
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  • I’d always known I was bi, but being married to a cishet guy since I was 25, it wasn’t a major factor in my life until I decided to come out publicly in 2017.
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  • When I think primal the term primitive comes to mind and primal tribes.

Feeling the mix of adrenaline and sexual hormones rushing through my body, any pain I felt was mixed in deeply with my pleasure, creating a strange mix of sensations. I don’t consider myself in the least bit sadistic, but I also found a strange pleasure in “attacking” my partner. Again, it was a case of giving myself over to the animal in me.

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In these group dynamics, the members of each tribe tend to be very protective of one another. The answer for me is a little more complicated than a yes or no, but ultimately I do not identify as primal but am with a very primal Dominant. I certainly enjoy aspects of primal play, but the take down does not appeal or feel natural to me.

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“Think sassy and mischievous, versus straight-up disobedient,” Pfeuffer adds. In real life, if someone called you a “brat,” that would be super not OK. But in BDSM, being a brat has different implications.

The sole reason why my partner and I tried BDSM was try something new and exciting—and honestly, Fifty Shades of Grey was talked about a lot back then. We always to give it a go sometime to see if it something that we like and enjoy. I spoke with 10 people who shared how they got into BDSM and what exactly happened during their first-ever experience with it. There’s definitely something enticing about engaging in that primal, almost animalistic side. One can shed all the worries of the day andjust exist in that space.

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Or just talk about it in the context of sexual fantasies by asking your partner if they’ve ever tried anything like BDSM or if they’ve ever wanted to. If you think about it, you’re only risking one awkward conversation, and the payoff can be huge if this is something you want in your life. „It’s a way of discussing the experience ahead of time that can increase emotional security,“ says Thorn. Whenever people question the role of consent in BDSM, they should consider the enormous amount of communication that occurs before, during, and after the scenes. „We talk about it hugely before we ever do it,“ says Brame.

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